How to Quiet the Critical Inner Voice and Return to Self-Compassion

Intro: A Sacred Pause

If you’ve recently begun your journey with Soulful Wellness Soulutions, you’ve likely noticed something surprising: when we slow down and tune in… we hear everything more clearly.

Especially the voice that says:

“You’re not doing enough.”

“You should have healed by now.”

“Who do you think you are?”

That, my love, is the critical inner voice—an old, protective pattern disguised as truth.

In Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Dr. Lindsay C. Gibson, we learn that many of us internalized critical, shaming messages from caregivers who lacked emotional availability or maturity. These messages shaped the way we speak to ourselves even now, as adults.

But here’s the truth:

That voice isn’t you. And you don’t have to obey it.

What Is the Critical Inner Voice, Really?

The critical voice is often a reflection of early emotional wounds—created to help us survive environments where we felt unseen, unprotected, or judged.

In books like The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest, we see how beliefs formed in childhood become unconscious self-sabotage in adulthood.

That voice tries to “keep you safe” by:

Holding you back from vulnerability

Pushing you toward perfectionism

Criticizing you before others can

But you’ve outgrown those survival patterns.

Now, your healing journey is about replacing judgment with self-compassion.

A Soulful 3-Step Practice to Quiet the Voice and Come Back to Compassion

🌱 1.

Name It to Disarm It

When you hear your inner critic say, “You’re failing,” or “You’re too sensitive,” pause and say:

“That’s not my truth. That’s the voice of fear I learned long ago.”

You might even give it a nickname (mine is “Worry Wanda” 🙃).

Naming it helps you become the observer, not the voice itself.

💗 2.

Replace Judgment with Curiosity

Ask:

Where did I learn to speak to myself like this?

What belief is underneath this thought?

What would I say to a friend who felt this way?

Authors like Louise Hay (You Can Heal Your Life) and Dr. Nicole LePera (How to Do the Work) emphasize this kind of awareness as a path to self-reparenting.

🌈 3.

Speak Back With Radical Compassion

Psychologist and mindfulness teacher Tara Brach calls this radical compassion:

“Meeting life with a tender presence.”

Her R.A.I.N. practice (Recognize, Allow, Investigate, Nurture) helps us soften inner criticism with nonjudgmental awareness and love. When you respond to your inner voice not with resistance but with nurturing presence, your healing deepens.

Try affirmations like:

“It’s okay to feel this way.”

“I am worthy of love—even when I’m struggling.”

“I choose to hold myself in kindness instead of shame.”

These are not just affirmations—they’re spiritual medicine.

Let’s Break the Cycle Together

Many of us—especially those raised by emotionally immature caregivers—were never taught how to soothe ourselves. We learned to perform, perfect, or people-please to earn love and safety.

But now?

We can create a new inner world. One that affirms our worth, honors our emotions, and allows space for healing.

This is the soul of Soulful Wellness Soulutions:

Healing not through shame—but through presence, patience, and love.

✨ Want to Go Deeper?

Here are a few soul-nourishing tools and books to continue your inner work:

📚 Recommended Reading:

Radical Compassion by Tara Brach

Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson

The Mountain Is You by Brianna Wiest

How to Do the Work by Dr. Nicole LePera

You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay

The Four Agreements by Don Miguel

You deserve a gentler inner world. Let’s build it together. 💜

✨ Weekly Insight Recap | Soulful Wellness Soulutions ✨

✨ Weekly Insight Recap | Soulful Wellness Soulutions ✨

“Growth looks like breaking sometimes. But not all breaking is destruction. Some of it is sacred reconstruction.”

This week felt like a soulful detox—a shedding, a reckoning, a remembering. Through deep inner work, inspired readings, and daily ritual, I kept circling back to the same sacred truth: healing isn’t about fixing what’s broken. It’s about releasing what was never ours to carry in the first place.

1. Healing the Inner Child | From Surviving to Sovereignty

In Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, I felt seen in a new way. The fog of childhood starts to lift when we name what was missing, misunderstood, or misinterpreted. Emotional immaturity in our caregivers can leave us carrying guilt, shame, and the invisible labor of trying to earn love. This week, I reminded my inner child that she no longer has to perform, please, or pretend. She gets to exist fully, freely, and safely.

2. Bag Lady Energy | Erykah Badu Meets The Untethered Soul

Reading The Untethered Soul alongside listening to Erykah Badu’s “Bag Lady” hit deep. Michael Singer speaks of the mental baggage we carry—stories, fears, and identities—that weigh us down. Erykah sang it before I read it: “Bag lady, you gon’ hurt your back, draggin’ all them bags like that.” This week, I recognized how often I grip old pain, future fears, and outdated beliefs as if they define me. I am learning to gently put the bags down one by one so I can move, dance, and breathe. Because peace isn’t earned by carrying more. It’s found by carrying less.

3. Positive Disintegration | Let the Cracks Be Sacred

The discomfort I felt this week wasn’t a sign that I’m off track. It was a sign of positive disintegration. This concept, rooted in the work of Kazimierz Dabrowski, helped me reframe emotional unraveling as growth. Sometimes the version of us we’ve outgrown needs to dissolve so the soul-aligned self can emerge. I let myself feel messy, uncertain, and cracked open. And through that, something softer and stronger began to rise.

4. Rising Strong | Everyday Courage

Inspired by Brené Brown, I leaned into vulnerability not as weakness but as daily bravery. Rising strong didn’t mean fixing all the things. It meant showing up, telling the truth, and choosing softness even when I wanted to shut down. It meant saying, this is hard, and I’m still worthy. I don’t have to carry the old story anymore. I get to rise truthfully, slowly, and with heart.

5. Soulful Practice | Grounding in Ritual

This week at Soulful Wellness Soulutions, I stayed anchored through

🌿 Morning energy clearing with movement, breath, and smoke medicine

📝 Journaling prompts like

• What emotional baggage am I ready to release?

• What does my bag lady voice sound like, and how can I lovingly set her down?

💧 Nightly nervous system check-ins with soft music, gentle touch, and deep presence

⸻

🎶 Integration Invitation

What bags are you dragging that no longer belong to you?

What would it feel like to stop, exhale, and gently put them down?

Let Erykah remind you. Let Michael guide you. Let your soul choose freedom.

You are not your baggage. You are the one choosing what to carry and what to release.

And you, beautiful soul, deserve to walk light.

With love, rhythm, and rising grace

Natalie | Soulful Wellness Soulutions

The Soul Behind Soulful Wellness Soulutions

Welcome, beautiful soul 💜

I’m so grateful you’ve found your way here. Whether you’re just starting your healing journey or deep in your self-discovery, this space was created with you in mind. This first blog post is a little different, it’s personal. It’s the story of how I got here, why Soulful Wellness Soulutions exists, and the heart behind everything I share.

My Story

I’m Natalie Gonzales- Mama, holistic health coach, and someone who’s lived through darkness and found light.

My path hasn’t been easy. I’ve faced depression, anxiety, and battled substance abuse. I’ve also walked the road of recovery and transformation through support groups, spirituality, ancestral wisdom, and deep self-work.

Becoming a mother gave me even more reason to heal. Not just for myself, but for the generations that follow. It’s what inspired me to build a life that reflects the values I hold dear: authenticity, wellness, and soul-centered living.

That vision gave birth to Soulful Wellness Soulutions, intentionally spelled with “soul” at the center.

My Mission

To guide women and families on a journey of holistic healing—supporting emotional, spiritual, and physical wellness through compassionate coaching, creative tools, and ancestral practices.

My Vision

A world where healing is accessible, wellness is soul-led, and people feel empowered to rewrite their stories, reclaim their energy, and reconnect with who they truly are.

My Values

🌿 Integrity – I walk my talk and hold space with honesty and humility.

🌀 Empowerment – You are the expert of your life. I’m just here to walk beside you.

🌈 Wholeness – True wellness honors mind, body, spirit, and community.

💜 Compassion – Healing happens in safe, loving spaces.

🌻 Cultural Reverence – I honor my roots and hold space for yours.

Why This Matters

I know what it’s like to feel stuck, overwhelmed, disconnected and I also know it’s possible to feel whole. That’s why I do this work. Through SWS, I share what’s helped me and hold space for others to find what works for them.

Whether it’s through coaching, journaling, ritual, or simply reading these blog posts, know you’re not alone. Healing is possible. Growth is sacred. Your story matters.

Let’s Stay Connected

If this resonated with you, I’d love to hear from you. Leave a comment, sign up for my newsletter, or just keep checking back for new posts on everything from self-care to soul work.

With love & light,

Natalie 🌿

Founder, Soulful Wellness Soulutions

Where to Begin on Your Journey to Soulful Wellness Soulutions

Welcome, Soul Seeker 🌿

If you’ve landed here, chances are you’re feeling the call for something deeper a desire to reconnect with yourself, your body, your mind, and your spirit in a way that feels authentic, grounded, and soul-led. That’s exactly what Soulful Wellness Soulutions is all about.

But with so much information out there, you might be wondering: Where do I even begin?

Let me walk you through the first simple yet powerful steps you can take to begin your journey back home—to yourself.

Step 1: Give Yourself Permission to Begin

Before the green juices, meditation cushions, or morning routines, the first shift is internal.

You don’t need to have it all figured out. You just need to decide that you’re ready to grow, heal, and reconnect with your wholeness.

Ask yourself gently:

✨ What part of me is calling for more love, care, or attention?

✨ What does my soul need right now?

Step 2: Set an Intention, Not a Deadline

Soulful wellness isn’t a race it’s a rhythm.

Start with a simple, heart-centered intention.

For example:

💫 “I want to feel more grounded in my daily life.”

💫 “I’m ready to heal the patterns that are no longer serving me.”

💫 “I want to show up for myself with compassion and presence.”

Write it down. Keep it close. Let it guide your choices.

Step 3: Choose One Soul-Aligned Practice to Start

You don’t need to do everything at once. In fact, the most powerful transformations come from consistent, simple actions.

Here are a few soulful starting points:

Daily Energy Protection & Cleansing Ritual (Start your morning with intention)

Self-Soothing Journal Prompts (Make space for your emotions and insights)

Mindful Mornings (Even just 10 minutes without your phone, just you)

Herbal Mocktail Moment in the evening (Choose nourishment over numbing)

Choose one. Practice it daily or a few times a week. Let it become your anchor.

Step 4: Reflect Often & Celebrate Small Wins

Healing and growth are subtle. You might not see the change overnight but it is happening.

Keep a simple reflection journal or use our Coaching Session Reflection Pages to track:

What’s feeling easier

What emotions are surfacing

What you’re grateful for

And don’t forget: Every baby step is sacred.

Step 5: Reach Out for Support

You don’t have to do this alone.

Soulful Wellness Soulutions was created to be a safe space for healing, empowerment, and radical self-love. Whether you’re looking for:

1:1 coaching

Group workshops

Journals, rituals, and mini-courses

This space is here for you.

Start by exploring the free resources or booking a complimentary discovery call. I’d love to meet you exactly where you are.

The Journey Begins with You

You don’t need to wait for a new moon, a Monday, or a milestone to begin.

You can begin right now with a single breath, a loving thought, or a gentle “yes” to your soul’s whisper.

You’re not broken. You’re becoming.

And your journey is sacred.

Let Soulful Wellness Soulutions walk with you step by step, breath by breath, back home to your true self.

✨ Ready to begin?